When actions creak louder than words.
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway... The good fortune to run into the ones I do... And the eyesight to tell the difference!
I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses.
It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.
Middle age is when you burn the midnight oil around 9:00 pm.
One evening, two old men from a retirement home were sitting on the front porch of the retirement home.
One man said to the other old man, "You know, Albert, if you think about it, we are not that old. I mean, my memory is still very good."
As the man said this, he knocked on the wooden chair beside him. "Actually, as sharp as ever."
After a couple minutes of silence, the first man started to talk again, "So, is anyone going to get the door, or do I have to do it?"
