A Few Laughs

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Answering machine message,"I am not available right now, but  thank you for caring enough to call. I am making  some changes in my life. Please leave a
message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes."

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My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine.

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Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your  glasses.

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Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting. 

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The  irony of life is that, by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere.

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God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.

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I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps 
getting harder to find one.

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Every morning is the dawn of a new error.

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The quote of the month is by Jay  Leno:
 
"With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"

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  Aspire to inspire before you expire.