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Saturday, September 3, 2016

Fifteen Words That You Will Only Understand If Your From Louisiana

In Louisiana, just like in every state, there are some phrases that are so natural to utter they’ve become second nature. Local dialect can speak volumes in regards to a state’s culture, unique history, and traditions. Louisiana is rich in Cajun and Creole influences and many sayings have thus evolved out of those influences. Here are just a handful of sayings you’re sure to hear all the time in this Southern state.

Saturday, August 13, 2016

545 vs 300,000,000

DEAR FRIENDS, PLEASE READ THIS . NO  OFFENSE INTENDED IF YOU ARE HAPPY WITH THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING. WE ARE ALL AMERICANS. JUST DELETE IT OR  SEND IT ON. THANKS, CONNIE
 
545 vs 300,000,000 EVERY CITIZEN NEEDS TO READ THIS AND THINK ABOUT WHAT THIS JOURNALIST HAS  SCRIPTED IN THIS MESSAGE.  READ IT  AND THEN REALLY THINK ABOUT OUR CURRENT POLITICAL DEBACLE.

Charley  Reese has been a journalist for 49 years.


545  PEOPLE
By Charlie Reese

Politicians are the only people in the world  who create problems and then campaign against them.

Have you ever  wondered, if both the Democrats and the Republicans are against deficits, WHY do we have deficits?

Have you ever wondered, if  all the politicians are against inflation and high taxes, WHY do we have  inflation and high taxes?

You and I don't propose a federal budget.  The president does.

You and I don't have the  Constitutional authority to vote on appropriations. The House of  Representatives does.

You and I don't write the tax code, Congress  does.

You and I don't set fiscal policy, Congress does.

You  and I don't control monetary policy, the Federal Reserve  Bank does.

One hundred senators, 435 congressmen, one  president, and nine Supreme Court justices equates to 545 human  beings out of the 300 million are directly, legally, morally,  and individually responsible for the domestic problems that plague  this country.

I excluded the members of the Federal Reserve  Board because that problem was created by the  Congress.  In 1913, Congress delegated its Constitutional duty  to provide a sound currency to a federally chartered, but private, central  bank.

I excluded all the special interests and lobbyists for a  sound reason.. They have no legal authority.  They have no  ability to coerce a senator, a congressman, or a president to do one  cotton-picking
thing.  I don't care if they offer a politician $1 million dollars in cash.  The  politician has the power to accept or reject it. No matter what  the lobbyist promises, it is the legislator's responsibility  to determine  how he votes.

Those 545 human beings spend much of their energy  convincing you that what they did is not their fault.   They cooperate in this common con regardless of party.
What  separates a politician from a normal human being is an  excessive amount of gall.  No normal  human being would have the gall of a  Speaker, who stood up and criticized the President for creating  deficits..  The president can only propose a budget.   He cannot force the Congress to accept  it.

The Constitution, which is the supreme law of the  land, gives sole responsibility to the House of  Representatives for originating and approving appropriations and taxes.  Who is the speaker of the House?   Nancy Pelosi.  She is  the leader of the majority party.  She and  fellow House members, not the president, can approve any budget they want.  If the president vetoes it, they can pass it over his veto if  they agree  to.

It seems inconceivable to me that a nation of 300 million can  not replace 545 people who stand convicted -- by present facts -- of  incompetence and irresponsibility.  I can't think of a  single domestic problem  that is not traceable directly to those 545 people.  When you fully  grasp the plain truth that 545 people exercise the power of the federal  government, then it must follow that what exists is what they want to  exist.

If the tax code is unfair, it's because they want it  unfair.

If the budget is in the red, it's because they want it in  the red ..

If the Army &Marines are in  IRAQ ,  it's because they want them in IRAQ

If they do not  receive social security but are on an elite retirement plan not available  to the people, it's because they want it that way.

There are no  insoluble government problems.

Do not let these 545 people shift  the blame to bureaucrats, whom they hire and whose jobs they can  abolish; to lobbyists, whose gifts and advice they can reject; to  regulators, to whom they give the power to regulate and from whom they can  take this power.  Above all, do not let them con you into  the belief that there exists disembodied mystical forces like "the  economy," "inflation," or "politics" that prevent them from doing  what they take an oath to do.

Those 545 people, and they  alone, are responsible.

They, and they alone, have the  power.

They, and they alone, should be held accountable by the  people who are their bosses.

Provided the voters have the  gumption to manage their own employees.

We should vote all of  them out of office and clean up their mess!

Charlie Reese is a former columnist of the Orlando Sentinel  Newspaper.

What you do with this article now that you have  read it.......... Is up to you.


This might be funny if it weren't so darned true.
Be sure to read all the way to the end:
 
      Tax his land,
      Tax his bed,
      Tax the table
      At which he's fed.
 
      Tax his tractor,
      Tax his mule,
      Teach him taxes
      Are the rule.
 
      Tax his work,
      Tax his pay,
      He works for peanuts
      Anyway!
      Tax his cow,
      Tax his goat,
      Tax his pants,
      Tax his coat.
      Tax his ties,
      Tax his shirt,
      Tax his work,
      Tax his dirt.
 
      Tax his tobacco,
      Tax his drink,
      Tax him if he
      Tries to think.
 
      Tax his cigars,
      Tax his beers,
      If he cries
      Tax his tears.
 
      Tax his car,
      Tax his gas,
      Find other ways
      To tax his ass.
 
      Tax all he has
      Then let him know
      That you won't be done
      Till he has no dough.
 
      When he screams and hollers;
      Then tax him some more,
      Tax him till
      He's good and sore.
      Then tax his coffin,
      Tax his grave,
      Tax the sod in
      Which he's laid.
 
      Put these words
      Upon his tomb,
      Taxes drove me
      to my doom...'
 
      When he's gone,
      Do not relax,
      Its time to apply
      The inheritance tax.
  
      Accounts Receivable Tax
      Building Permit Tax
      CDL license Tax
      Cigarette Tax
      Corporate Income Tax
      Dog License Tax
      Excise Taxes
      Federal Income Tax
      Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
      Fishing License Tax
      Food License Tax
      Fuel Permit Tax
      Gasoline Tax (currently 44.75 cents per gallon)
      Gross Receipts Tax
      Hunting License Tax
      Inheritance Tax
      Inventory Tax
      IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
      Liquor Tax
      Luxury Taxes
      Marriage License Tax
      Medicare Tax
      Personal Property Tax
      Property Tax
      Real Estate Tax
      Service Charge T ax
      Social Security Tax
      Road Usage Tax
      Sales Tax
      Recreational Vehicle Tax
      School Tax
      State Income Tax
      State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
      Telephone Federal Excise Tax
      Telephone Federal Universal Ser vice FeeTax
      Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
      Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge=2 0Tax
      Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
      Telephone State and Local Tax
      Telephone Usage Charge Tax
      Utility Taxes
      Vehicle License Registration Tax
      Vehicle Sales Tax
      Watercraft Registration Tax
      Well Permit Tax
      Workers Compensation Tax
      If the Democrats have their way, this list will get longer......MUCH LONGER. Is this what you want?????
  

     
STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY? Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.  We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids. What in the hell happened? Can you spell 'politicians?'
And I still have to 'press 1' for English!?
 
I hope this goes around THE USA at least 100 times!!!  YOU can help it get there!!!
      GO AHEAD - - - BE AN AMERICAN!!!

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

My Wife's Riding Lawn Mower



My wife's riding Lawn Mower is now for Sale
Here's the story.  It's still hard to believe the way it turned out.
My wife said she wanted a riding lawn mower.  She works all day and was always tired when she came home from work.  I thought that a riding lawn mower would help her get the yard work done quicker so she would have more time for the chores inside.  So, being the handy sort of guy that I am, I made her a riding lawn mower.    
I even put a light on it so she could work at night, after she finishes putting away the dinner dishes.
I thought she would squeal with delight or something and give me a big hug.                  
To this day I still can't understand why some women are so hard to please!!

    P.S.  I can see out of my left eye pretty good now and should be able to leave the hospital sometime next week!

A Few Funny Jokes

A senior sounds off
My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds.  Only 15 to go.

Ate salad for dinner!  Mostly croutons & tomatoes.  Really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce.  And cheese.   FINE, it was a pizza.  I ate a pizza.

How to prepare Tofu:
1.  Throw it in the trash.
2.  Grill some Meat.

I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

I don't mean to brag but... I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours and 20 minutes.

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.

Kids today don't know how easy they have it.  When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.

Senility has been a smooth transition for me.

Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero they closed school?
Me neither.

I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented... I forgot where I was going with this.

I love being over 50.   I learn something new every day... and forget 5 others.

A thief broke into my house last night... He started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him.

My dentist told me I need a crown.  I was like:  I KNOW!  Right?

I think I'll just put an "Out of Order" sticker on my forehead and call it a day.

PS:  Did you remember on Daylight Savings changeover to not forget to set your bathroom scale back 10 pounds?

How To Copy And Paste

How To Copy and Paste Text:

1. Hold down the mouse button and drag the mouse over the text to highlight the information you want to copy. 
2. Let go of the mouse button. 
3. Select Copy from the Edit menu. A copy of the text is held in your computer's memory.
4. Place the cursor in the space where you want to paste and click once. 
5. Select Paste from the Edit menu. The text appears in the new space.

10 Life Lessons Owning a Pet Can Teach Your Child

  1. Responsibility: Pets require daily feeding, exercise, and affection, not to mention grooming and potty time (and clean-up). Older children can learn how to care for another living creature and even younger children can help with feeding and playtime.
  2. Trust: It’s easy to spill your heart out to your pet, who will offer you unconditional support in return. Pets make wonderful trusted companions for children and can be a first step to helping your child build trust in other relationships, too.
  3. Compassion: Caring for a pet requires compassion, understanding, and empathy. Kids learn to be kind and to take care of others’ basic needs.
  4. Bereavement: When a pet passes away, your child will inevitably feel the pain of the loss, but in turn will learn how to cope during the bereavement period. 
  5. Respect: Owning a pet teaches children how to respect others. They must touch them gently, tend to their needs, and learn not to disturb them when they’re eating or sleeping.
  6. Self-Esteem: Pets show unconditional love, which can be a great boost to a child’s self-esteem. So, too, can the satisfaction that comes from having responsibility and caring for a pet’s needs.
  7. Loyalty: A pet’s loyalty toward its owner is often unmatched. In turn, children learn the importance of showing loyalty to their devoted furry friend.
  8. Physical Activity: Children who own a dog learn how fun physical activity can be while they play tug-of-war, fetch, or go for walks with their pet. Research shows, in fact, that children in dog-owning families spend more time being physically active than children without dogs.2
  9. Patience: Bonding with a new pet often takes time. Your child will learn patience while your new pet becomes comfortable in your home and also during training.
  10. Social Skills: Dogs can be an amazing social “ice breaker.” Taking your dog for walks as a family can improve your child’s social skills as you interact with others. Pets may also help children with autism to develop social skills such as sharing.
There are many other benefits as well. Your child can have her basic emotional and physical needs fulfilled by a pet, including comforting contact, love, and affection.3
Research also shows that children from dog-owning homes (during their first year of life) have fewer ear infections and respiratory tract infections, and require fewer antibiotics, perhaps because the exposure stimulates the immune system.4
Other noted benefits include a significantly reduced risk of allergies and even better grades at school, presumably because owning a pet seems to give kids greater motivation.

Is Your Child Ready for a Pet?

Very young children shouldn’t be expected to care for pets without assistance. They can help, of course, but if your child is under 5 you can assume that you’ll be doing most of the pet care. Further, it’s difficult for very young children to understand how to gently handle a pet, which is why they’re often overly rough and may injure an animal – or become injured themselves if the pet retaliates.
Children under the age of 3-4 should be monitored with pets at all times, and even children under 10 should not be expected to care for a dog or cat completely on their own.5
If your older child expresses the desire for a pet, it’s a good time to have a talk about responsibility and the permanency of owning a pet. Be sure your child has expressed a consistent desire for a pet (not simply a passing mention) and understands that it will require daily care (work) and not just playtime.
It’s a good idea to set up expectations ahead of time for what pet-care responsibilities your child will need to fulfill. Discuss these with your child and agree upon them together.
That being said, even if your child commits to the responsibility, only add a pet to your family if you are prepared to take over their care if your child does not. If you decide your child is ready for a pet, resist the urge to give her one as a surprise. Instead, involve your child in each step of the process, including selecting the right pet for your family.

What Are the Best Pets for Children?

This depends largely on the age of your child and your family’s lifestyle and interests. Some children enjoy a small pet, such as fish or a hamster that lives in their room, while others are drawn to dogs or cats. All pets require considerable responsibility – even “starter” pets like fish and turtles. Of course, a dog or cat will require far more daily attention.
If you decide to add a dog to your family, the following are among the top 10 dog breeds for kids:
  1. Golden Retriever
  2. Labrador Retriever
  3. Poodle
  4. Irish Setter
  5. Vizsla
  6. Newfoundland
  7. Collie
  8. Bull Terrier
  9. Beagle
  10. Bulldog
No matter which pet you choose, your child stands to benefit greatly, as does your entire family. When children between the ages of 3 and 14 were asked about the emotional benefits of owning a pet, 85 percent said they regard their pets as friends and 40 percent looked for their pet if they were upset.6
As Susan Dawson, a researcher in human communications at Manchester Metropolitan University, told the Daily Mail:7
“From studies I have carried out backed up by case studies it becomes clear that pet ownership, or simply the chance to spend some time with pets, children can benefit a lot…
They learn nurturing skills and are rewarded for their efforts… They are given unconditional warmth which can be reassuring and they actually seem more motivated to talk and describe their experiences.”
Source: healthypets.mercola.com/

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Happy Father's Day

Only a Dad
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Edgar A. Guest (1916)
clr gif

Only a dad with a tired face,
Coming home from the daily race,
Bringing little of gold or fame
To show how well he has played the game;
But glad in his heart that his own rejoice
To see him come and to hear his voice.

Only a dad with a brood of four,
One of ten million men or more
Plodding along in the daily strife,
Bearing the whips and the scorns of life,
With never a whimper of pain or hate,
For the sake of those who at home await.

Only a dad, neither rich nor proud,
Merely one of the surging crowd,
Toiling, striving from day to day,
Facing whatever may come his way,
Silent whenever the harsh condemn,
And bearing it all for the love of them.

Only a dad but he gives his all,
To smooth the way for his children small,
Doing with courage stern and grim
The deeds that his father did for him.
This is the line that for him I pen:
Only a dad, but the best of men.